Year of Yays! The '2023' Edition.

MERRY CHRISTMAS, Love!

Happy, Happy Monday to you!

Monday #054 Time Stamp: 10:38 AM CST

I have some EXTRA pep in my step today because...

1. It's the day of my dear Savior's birth. Happy Birthday, Jesus!

AND..

2. I have a brand new look to my blog now. In 2024, I will begin the process of building a whole new website and home for my blog to breathe, live, grow and thrive!

I want you guys to absolutely enjoy this beautiful holiday in whatever way you celebrate BUT just 3 major YAYS I want to share with you in this Christmas edition of my blog I like to call, 'The Year of Yays, 2023!'

• In 2023, I prayed for courage for God to give me the strength to move forward with my life in the healthiest and most productive ways possible! In 2023, I had to grieve the loss of several long time friends who no longer served a purpose in my life! It was so painful. This is a season where God wants to do new things in my life when it comes to ALL of my relationships! I have gone without for years and this year, God and I dealt with that area of my life and I REALLY needed to heal. AND I have! I have done the hard work and am now ready for God to replace every one of those old relationships!
• In 2023, I learned how to put myself 1st! This year, I have truly learned how to invest in MYSELF!!! And I have learned that every woman should learn how to do that, ESPECIALLY if you are a single woman of God! We are responsible for SO much. When I say invested in myself, I mean taking care of every aspect of my life. And if I cannot change what needs to be changed in the current moment, I am at least acknowledging it. I have learned how to be fully accountable for EVERYTHING that is going on in my life!
• In 2023, I learned how to take ACTION! I began working a retail job as a Supervisor in August of 2023 and my level of body movement changed drastically. I walk between 4,000 to 5k steps every single day at work. I removed all dairy from my diet in April 2023 so it was like I got a head start on my weight loss goals! Since February 2023, I have dropped 21 pounds. YAAASSS! I feel and look better than I have in years and I am just getting started! This year, I have learned to power of taking Action everyday because we know that..
• 'Faith Without Works Is Dead!'-James 2:26

Addressing these 3 major areas in my life has given me SO much confidence and I have discovered a whole new level of LOVE and RESPECT for myself! 2024-Let's ROLL!

Enjoy this beautiful holiday, my love! I love you and there is absolutely nothing you can do about it! Smiling!

72 Hours.

Happy Monday, Superstar!

Monday #053 Time Stamp: 8:39 AM CST

My weekend was SUPER restful and I have a lot to say this beautiful Monday morning! I have had this nudge from the Holy Spirit that I am called into the motivational speaking space for several years now! To be honest, it is why I continue writing in this, 'Motivational Monday' platform every week. I began following, Trent Shelton, a Christian based motivational speaker, author and former NFL wide receiver. Trent played with my twin brother, Julius when he played with the Seattle Seahawks in 2008! Trent has a Christian-based ministry called, 'Rehab Time.' I have been following him for years. Actually, he is the one who inspired me to begin making videos from my car!!! It is so much fun, you guys! 

One day after work last week, I was feeling a little defeated. Trent has become my go-to for wholesome and positive messages. I logged onto Facebook and he was talking about the things that have happened in his life that should have made him quit! He lost his mother a few years ago and losing a parent is one of the most painful things adults have to endure. Trent went onto say something that stuck with me. 'When things happen in my life that are hard to understand and that make me want to give up...I give myself 72 hours to vent, cry, complain and then I am moving on with my life!' For me, that means 72 hours of leaning on my own understanding...but when things happen in my life that I do not understand, I immediately play my favorite gospel song,' Run Til I Finish,'-by Smokie Norful. God knows we will not understand everything that we have to endure in life. This is why he sent the Holy Spirit. We are all human and dealing with life is always hard to understand...But, God gives us peace if we ask him for it. He will comfort us and give us grace to endure whatever trial we are struggling with. 

I hope you guys have a wonderful week leading up to Christmas! I absolutely love this holiday. Just a chance to celebrate the reason for the season, spend time with my family and do something we all love, EAT baby! YAAAASSS!!! This time of year allows me to assess my year and prepare for the 1st quarter of 2024, which I am doing right now. I encourage you guys to make a list of some things you want to accomplish or want to come to fruition in 2024 and begin working on them now. Be intentional with your time right now. 72 hours can turn into years if we are not careful and God wants YOU to use those 72 hours of trouble to bless others! Please, let me know in the comments how I can pray for you in the next 2 weeks as we close out 2023. I love you and there is absolutely nothing you can do about it! Have a beautiful day! Let's GOOOO! Smiling.

Discomfort of Destiny vs Familiarity!

Happy Monday, sweets! BRRrrrrrr!

Monday #052 Time Stamp: 8:05 AM CST

Baby, IT'S COLD OUTSIDE! And winter doesn't even begin in the Nashville area until a few days after Christmas! Maybe this is an indication that we will have a white Christmas...

I hope you are well and have been since our last meet up. I wanted to talk about 'Destiny' today! I have found that over the years, I have been tempted to remain in my comfort zone during the more trying moments in my life. After I gain some clarity from my savior, I push through and am ALWAYS glad that I did! The simple fact is, your comfort zone is not a home, IT IS A CAGE. 

I believe that we were all put here on an assignment! We aren't here to merely do what we want. We can but that's not our destiny! Your destiny or your calling requires you to partner with God in order to get clear on your assignment. Sure, it is easier to just stay in your comfort zone and never find out why you were REALLY put on this earth! I was created to be an educator and I believe I am fulfilling that calling. But there is so much more for me to discover. I really despise being in my comfort zone at any time. It is just so isolating and lonely. Finding your destiny will be uncomfortable because it is only for YOU! Once you find your gift, you are meant to hone in on it and perfect it and ultimately, share it with the world! Every single person on this planet has a unique gift! Once I started to explore the things I was really good at, life started to really open up for me! To find my gift, I just paid attention to the activities that I found myself doing consistently well and that I would do for free! It has been difficult getting here but this is MY journey! MY story! AND everyone has one. Let's get comfortable with being uncomfortable and find DESTINY! I love you and there is nothing you can do about it! LET'S GOOOOO! Smiling.

Apples To Oranges!

Happy Monday, love!

Monday #051 Time Stamp: 11:35AM CST

I hope your Monday is off to an incredible start! This is my 1st blog post since mid-September and I am super excited to connect again...SMILING!!! The Christmas holiday season is HERE and I couldn't be more excited!!! Christmas is my absolute favorite time of year and I LOVE celebrating all that it means! But it has not always been this way for me. I used to struggle with slight seasonal depression from 2010-2013. It was such a battle and it was something that I had to work through with God, my therapists and my Dr.'s at the time. It has been so hard at times. BUT, I have remained faithful and that depression has been lifted!!!! PRAISE HIM!!! 

Most, not all but, MOST of the depression came from my need to compare myself to other people. Comparison is something that many of us do during the holiday season. It is like comparing apples to oranges! It is so easy to just assume that EVERYONE around us is so happy and to assume that they are doing SO much better than you! It is just not true and everyone living has problems of some kind! It is absolutely absurd to believe that others have a problem free life. This is the way that an unhealthy mind thinks! Social media would have us to believe that a svelte woman with 50K followers, an attractive husband, cute kids and a dog live a problem free life!!  NO ma'am! That is an illusion and we have to guard our hearts from believing these things. I am only able to participate in social media because I spend a lot of time with God! I read his word daily! I enjoy it, it fills me up and it is exactly what my spirit needs daily, BUT even more when I am using social media. 

These days, my agenda is filled with me thinking of ways to turn my trials in life into a testimony to help people to become Overcomers, too! That is what spending time with God does for me. Having a large bank account and being attractive do not equal happiness! Please, stop comparing yourselves to people on social media. YOU are all that you need! YOU!!! We have no idea what others have gone through to be at their level in life. Do you know what is a trillion times better that happiness? JOY! We are 21 days away from Christmas 2023 AND 28 days from beginning a brand new year! Celebrate yourself just the way you are right now! YAAAASSSS!!!! I love you AND there is absolutely nothing you can do about it! Let's GOOOOO!!! Smiling!

10 Amazing Charities To Support/Donate To In 2023!

Happy Happy Monday, love muffn!

Monday #050 Time Stamp: 7:11PM CST

It has been a super busy day after 2 days off this past weekend but I wanted to put you on to something I have been working on for some time now. During some of the most difficult times in my life, one of the things I started doing for healing was SERVING! Honestly, putting others before yourself is a major component of JOY! I know it sounds crazy but it is SO true. 

I absolutely love to give: 

LOVE

TIME

ENERGY

HOPE

RESOURCES

MONEY

HUGS

And, during the last quarter of 2023, I would like to begin giving to some of my favorite charities!

Here are 10 Amazing charities I am thinking of donating to!

10. Mental Health America

09. St. Jude

08. Prevent Child Abuse America

07. Action Against Hunger

06. Global Fund For Women: Support Gender Equality

05. National Alliance Against Hunger

04. Coalition of Homelessness: In This Tent Together

03. Color of Change: Civil Rights Advocacy Organization

02. The Alzheimer's Association

01. The Innocence Project: Justice for Everyone

Cue the music...'TREASURE, that is what YOU are!' By: Bruno Mars

Monday #049. Time Stamp: 3:00 PM CST

Happy Motivational Monday, beautiful!

Your Monday pep talk is HERE!!

God has given EVERYONE a gift! He has given everyone of us something or some things that YOU are exceptional in! As you evolve, grow and change in life, it is your job to find out what that gift is. I found my gifts and talents by surprisingly, going through PAIN! Also by serving my community, learning from my mistakes AND learning how to take constructive criticism on a daily basis! I say that pain was my biggest motivator because going through pain forces you to ACT! You can either lean in to the pain and let it motivate you, persevere and push you forward OR you can stay stuck and never evolve by not letting the pain mold and shape you into the person God wants you to be. That is what trying times in life are supposed to do! There are so many different layers to pain and suffering but the key for my healing has been staying and remaining HUMBLE throughout it all. I have also made the decision to give my life to Christ so that has been the backbone of my healing and success!

The more that you persevere through difficult seasons in your life, the more glory God gets and the more that you shed the old version of yourself and become NEW! This is how your gifts and talents are uncovered! Hebrews 12:1 tells us to lay aside the things in life that keep us from seeing clearly. Sin, distractions and selfishness keep us from finding and getting to the 'gifts and treasures!' Ephesians 1:18 says to pray your eyes of understaning will be opened. When the eyes of understanding are blocked, discouragement will throw you off course, keeping you from seeing clearly which in turn, results in hopelessness. Today, I want to you to believe and put your trust in this scripture:

Matthew 6:21: '...where your heart is, there your treasure will be also!'

Keep persevering and you will find treasure, love! Cue the music, 'TREASURE... that is what YOU are!!!' By: Bruno Mars.

How To Recognize AND Leave A 'Co-Dependent' Relationship!

Monday #048. Time Stamp: 8:00 AM EST

Happy, Happy Monday love!

I hope that your week is off to a good start! My 42nd birthday was a week ago and I thank God that I am able to see another year! This past year has been so enlightening for me and I am just recognizing more and more that I am SUPER blessed! This past year has been full of so much growth. I have to say that it was the first year that I have been operating, functioning and living as a GROWN woman! What I mean by that is, I have been holding myself accountable for literally EVERYTHING in my life! Holding myself accountable for things I used to blame on others and doing my part to live the life that Jesus died to give me! This new and transformed Knetris, The Word Nerd, believes and lives as though everyday; myself and anyone connected to me is going higher! I am so thankful to have reached this level in my life! SO grateful!

Let me tell you a little about what I had to leave behind in order to reach this level in my life! When I was researching co-dependency, I felt myself getting angry all over again. I have survived several co-dependent relationships in my past. Most of them began in college when I was such a people pleaser. I have found that in most of these relationships, mainly with other females, I was always the strong one and the other party was so weak and insecure! Naturally, as we grow and evolve in life, we will grow apart from people we were once so close to. A Co-Dependent relationship can be between family members, your boss, colleagues, friends, siblings, and in anyone else who is dealing with a partnership where one person is healthy and the other is toxic! In essence, there is a severe power struggle going on and the toxic partner wants complete and total control over you! THEY are a hater that thinks they can do YOU better than YOU can do You! That is exactly what it is!

In 2006, I moved to Chicago, IL to pursue a career in Interior Design. School was wonderful and challenging and I was able to land a part time job at a custom carpet design studio. I was giving, giving, and giving my time, energy and focus to the relationships and the other party was taking, taking, TAKING advantage of me, verbally abusing and talking about me to others the entire time. A few months before moving away from Chicago, I was severally depressed and just had been so isolated from everyone. I would order take out to just throw it away when it arrived at my door. I had EVERYTHING! I had a really cute studio apartment in downtown Chicago and was enrolled in one of the MOST competitive design schools in the country. In addition to that, I already had a B.A in English from UVA so a second degree in a city as poppin as Chicago was an absolute dream! Seriously, I was living like a rockstar! BUT I was so unhappy and it was maily because of the relationships I was engaging in. At this point in my life, I was not strong enough to walk away from them yet. When you are weak, you can have a tendency to cling to anyone who will show you some love! What I needed to understand was God's love for me in that moment. It was not until I moved to Charlottesville,VA in 2007 that I began healing and therapy. I remember vividly that the manipulators I had for friends always wanted to hang around, come visit, gossip about others, and put me down during those hard times I was going through. God stepped into my life just in time to save IT AND remove them from my life. I stopped all communication from them for a season. It was so hard to do that but I have been healed as a result of being obedient!!! The devil was using them to literally kill me BUT God! God has taken their place and I know the new and healthy friendships that I am making right now are coming from him too!

If you are in a toxic or Co-Dependent relationship, It is most likely that you have not fully recognized the signs. OR maybe you have noticed some signs and you are just a little fearful to leave! 

10 signs that you are in a toxic and co-dependent relationship:

10. You feel anxiety when you don't hear from the other person. Like they may feel angry with you for not being around when you are away from them.

09. Manipulate and verbally abuse you when you try to better yourself.

08. When it is difficut to be alone.

07. When they do not want you to have any space or time to yourself.

06. When they get upset at you for setting healthy boundaries for yourself.

05. When you cancel plans to be with them.

04. When they manipulate you when you share your feelings with them. They try to discredit you and how you feel on a regular basis.

03. When they do not want you to have any other relationships besides theirs.

02. When they try to keep you from your other loved ones.

01. When they never want you to seek happiness for yourself!

Ways To Fight Back In A Toxic Relationship:

05: Tell them how you truly feel.

04: Invest in some good therapy and invite your partner to join you.

03: Find a good church home and reach out to a community there to get clear on how you can help the manipulator.

02: Begin and really set some boundaries for yourself!

01: KEEP Moving forward with YOUR life! The more a toxic person sees you evolving and moving on with your life, the more it shifts the power from them to YOU! You deserve a wonderful life, away from the toxicity. The more they see that their behavior is not stopping you and your elevation, the less control they have and the more likely they will leave your life forever.